DADS NOT PAYING CHILD SUPPORT
Copyright by Merlene Bishop
Dads, are you not paying child support due to the recession ?
It might help to know you aren't alone.
There are many other dads in the same situation.
If you are on good terms with your ex spouse, there are
some cooperative strategies you can work out that could
prevent you from going to jail.
Firstly, it would be to your benefit to point out to her that
if you are in jail your children won't see their dad, and being in
jail would eliminate taking advantage of any money making opportunities that you might find.
Even though you can't pay the full amount of child support, you could
work out an agreement with your ex to pay a partial amount,
which is better than not nothing.
You could also arrange to pay some of your kids' expenses
such as school clothes, soccer or baseball uniforms, and perhaps
a portion of medical or dental visits.
It would be much better for your kids' well being if you and
your ex spouse could talk to them together to explain your situation,
to help them understand that for the time being, until things
turn around for you financially, they need to manage with what they have.
You can teach them to understand the difference between needs and wants,
letting them know that their needs will be provided for but not to the extent
of having the "top of the line" in clothing and shoes.
Help them understand also that the quality of time you spend together
is the most important thing, and that tough times can bring you closer together as a family.
Dads not paying child support often feel guilty, thinking they are not taking care
of their children as well as they could.
Please avoid this thinking trap and know that you are doing the best you can.
At some point things will get better for you, and if your ex spouse is cooperative,
there is a possibility you can work out an arrangement to pay an extra amount
monthly in addition to the regular payments until you get caught up.
You can take comfort in knowing that as a dad you did as much as you could for your kids,
and they will remember that and love you for it.
HERE is a book that can help you calculate if you are paying the right amount of child support.